Love Affair with Dublin

I went into an old pub, a bit closer to my B&B.  It wasn’t very crowded yet, and I easily found a seat at the bar.  I ordered another Hop House 13, and just sat and took in the old Irish pub atmosphere.  I enjoyed just sitting there, drinking my beer, when along comes a guy.  He stands right next to me.  Kind of loud.  Knew the bartender.  Starting talking soccer.  I inquired about the soccer game they were talking about, and we started talking.  Just fun banter.  And we kept drinking. 

He was in from out of town.  He was staying at a very nice hotel, and we went there next for more drinks.  I started drinking gin and tonics.  I wish I knew what the gin was.  It was something local and really delicious.  We were definitely getting a buzz on.  We were kind of loud and laughing a lot. 

And then I was ready to go.  He walked me back to my B&B.  And then before I knew it, we were making out.  And then he was getting really sexual outside.  That was pushing my limit, so we went to my room. 

We were both very drunk, and though we fumbled around, nothing much happened.  We did manage to laugh a lot.  When it was obvious nothing was going to happen, he said he was going to go.  He asked if I wanted to go with him.  I said no.  And he left. 

It was fun.  I didn’t know his last name, where he lived or what he did.  I am sure he told me, but I didn’t remember.  And I didn’t care.  I hadn’t slept with anyone for almost a year, and it was fun to feel and explore someone else’s body. 

He was a weird guy.  Telling me about his designer clothes and expensive car.  I really didn’t care.  I care who someone is in their heart.  And he waxes his crotch.  I actually thought he had a disease.  It was a strange night, but I was smiling. 

This is not something I have done since my marriage.  I messed around a bit as a teenager before I met my ex.  But since my divorce, sleeping with random guys was not the path I wanted to take.  But I was on vacation.  And it felt incredibly liberating.  My choice.  I really felt great.  There was no remorse or mental shaming, like I had felt in my past.  I am a 58 year old woman, and I can do what I want to do.  And I realized having sex is an important part of being a woman.

The next day was a rainy day in Dublin.  I took advantage of the umbrella I threw into my suitcase at the last minute, and explored some of Dublin’s free museums.  I was really enjoying my own company.  I went to the Charles Beatty library at the Dublin Castle, which I really loved.  I went back to the pubs with the live music, and just truly fell in love with the live Irish music.  I decided I wanted to treat myself to a nice dinner, and went to a great restaurant by my B&B.  The Farm.  It was still raining when I left the restaurant, and decided to just make it an early night.

When I got back to my room, I started texting some friends back home.  One girlfriend suggested I get on Tinder.  Her step brother travels the world as a caddy for a professional golfer.  He gets on Tinder wherever he is, and has met a lot of people that way.  I thought what the heck, why not.

I had played around on Tinder before, with some weird results, and though I had deleted the app, when I reinstalled it, my profile popped up.  And I started swiping.  Since I was in Ireland, I was just having fun with it.  And men started to respond.  I got the many “hey” and ‘hiya”.  If they can’t speak in complete sentences, I delete right away.  I also got a couple of men who seemed interesting.  And 2 with whom I started to have conversations.  With one in particular, the messages went back and forth for quite a while.  And then he asked if I would like to meet for a coffee the next evening. 

Hmmm.  I have been on 7 previous “meets” from online sites, and know firsthand that even if they seem like nice interesting guys on the screen, in person he can be quite different.  And there may be zero connection.  But I thought what the heck, I would go for it.  And I said yes. 

We would be meeting at 6pm.  It was another glorious day in Dublin, and I spent it out and about, exploring the city and shopping a bit.  I treated myself to a lovely coffee and macaroons at a French cafe.  I wanted to stay present and not think about meeting this guy.  I went back to my room to get ready, and arrived to meet him exactly at 6pm.  When I got there, I looked around to see who he could be.  I saw a fat, dumpy guy and thought, oh my, could that be him.  Then I looked at my phone, and he said he was running about 5 minutes late.  I took a seat and told him where I was. 

As I was getting settled, he walked in.  I knew it was him right away.  There was an electric energy flowing between us from the get-go.  He sat down.  We ordered.  I had a glass of wine.  I needed it at that point.   The conversation flowed between us.  And he touched me as we spoke.  Just a tap.  I noticed it right away.  And this continued, back and forth as we spoke.  There was just this lovely, easy connection between us.   We had another round of drinks.  We talked and laughed. 

Then he asked if I was hungry, and suggested we go out for dinner.  I said sure.  We got up to leave.  And he leaned in and kissed me.  And we looked in each others eyes, and it was just really nice.  And I thought what the heck is happening in Dublin!

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