Is it a date?

I actually didn’t even know if I would recognize him.  When we talked about getting together, I asked if he just wanted to meet somewhere.  He said no, he would pick me up.  I was staying at my mother’s apartment.  He texted me when he got there.  I went down to meet him.  It was strange.  We weren’t sure what to do.  So we gave each other a hug and got in his car.  He had a fun evening planned.

As he drove, I was just staring at him.  It was surreal, after 2 1/2 months of talking on the phone, telling each other personal and intimate details of our lives and who we are, to actually be together.  I was still a bit nervous, and excited, too.

We went to Little Italy in Cleveland.  We walked around a bit first, and he told me about various places.  I used to go there is high school, but hadn’t been back in years.  Then we went to a restaurant.  I needed a glass of wine.  We ordered drinks and an appetizer, and just talked.  He and I seem to always be able to talk for hours.   After sitting there for a couple of hours, we decided to go somewhere else.  He wanted to take me to one of his favorite places in the area.  We walked over there, and were rather flirty.  I was holding on to his arm, and we also held hands.  When we got to the restaurant it was closed.  He felt bad.  I figured we just weren’t supposed to be there.

So we turned around and were walking back to the main strip.  After we walked for a while, he stopped me and kissed me.  Lightly.  Gently.  My heart totally melted.  I felt butterflies in my stomach.  And we just looked at each other.  After a few more kisses, we continued walking and stopped for another drink.  The conversation never stopped.  It was just so lovely to finally be with this man.

Then it was time to go.  We walked back to his car, kissed a bit, got in, and then started making out.  We were like teen-agers.  It was fun.  It felt really good.   And it was just making out.

We finally knew we should get going.  We were pretty quiet on the drive back to my mother’s.  I think we were both taking it all in.  And as much as we like to talk to one another, I found we are also very comfortable in silence together.

My mother is 97 and lives in an apartment.  We parked in the lot, talked and made out until it really was getting late and we both knew the night had to end.  It was such a great evening, we both wanted to see each other again Saturday night.

So I got out of the car, went up to my mom’s apartment, and there was just so much going on in my head.  Who is this guy?  Do I dare give my heart to someone again?  Was it a date?  How in the world do I go about having a relationship after all the hurt of my ex’s infidelity?  And do I even want to consider a long distance relationship?  My head hurt from all the thoughts going round and round.  But I knew the answer. And that is that I don’t know the answers, but just have to keep feeling my way through all this, trust my heart and trust that the Universe is giving me exactly what I need.

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